Let's start something. Seriously, start something! Something big!
But first let's discuss the reasoning behind us all needing to do this. What is 'this' you ask? This is something that can change the world, one dinner at a time.
Time. Ah, that word. That happens to be the word most thrown around in our current society.
"I don't have time"
"I don't think I can make time"
"That takes too much time"
"I don't have time for that"
Or
"sorry we just don't have the time but will try to make some time soon"
And frankly it's all a bunch of B.S.
Yea that's right, I'm calling out every single one of you that says that line of bull; including myself. You're lying. You know you could make the time, but you just don't want to put forth the effort. To you, there's always something more important you think you should be doing.
There's a saying that goes something like "make time for the ones you love", which I keep seeing people post on social media over and over again like they're
What's especially sad is that families have all fallen into this rut of "there just isn't time" too. What happened to the way families were? Even as a child, my family was constantly together (I'm talking extended families here). We always had dinners together. Parties together. Random outings together. Softball games together. Volleyball together. Just everything. As a kid, it felt incredible to have us all together so often. It made me feel so secure as a person; and loved. But nowadays, it isn't happening. Distance, lack of time, work, busy schedules, quarrels, grudges, etc. I see this everywhere. With everyone's families.
Is what you're doing more important than spending time with your own flesh and blood? Is what you're doing more important than making those connections with friends? Is what you're doing more important than showing how much you love these people by putting aside some time just for them?
I cannot possibly count how many times my own invitations to others have gone unanswered. Always with the line of "sorry we just don't have the time". Which yes, I do understand stuff comes up that may be urgent, but how about rescheduling and committing to a different date? Putting forth effort shows love, which can really mean the world to someone. Want the world to be a better place? Then do something about it!
Another common thing I see is that the same people who preach about togetherness and love, are the same ones I see not spending that time with their own families and friends, and instead spend their time focusing on other endeavors. So how can you preach togetherness with your family but not spend an ounce of time with them? There is absolutely nothing wrong with your other endeavors, but don't lose sight of the fact that your own family needs you, too. Brothers, sisters, Uncles, Aunts, Moms, Dads, grandparents, cousins. They all want a slice of your time. What good does it do when you're spreading word about togetherness but you aren't practicing that same philosophy in your own family? It makes you appear to be a hypocrite. Want to be a hypocrite? I didn't think so. You need to practice what you preach.
And so many times the only way people wake up to realize this is when someone passes away; when there's never going to be another opportunity to spend time with them. It's at that point people regret cancelling plans with them over whatever excuse they had at the time. It's at that point people will begin to see all the opportunities they had to spend time with said person. And it's at that point that you will realize your busy-ness wasn't necessary.
"People say you don't know what you've got till it's gone. Truth is, you knew what you had, you just never thought you'd lose it"
So instead of falling back into the same routine of keeping too busy for friends and family, how about you stop being so busy and focus a little on those special people in your life.
Did you have a childhood best friend whom you've lost touch with, but they still mean the world to you? Reach out to them.
Did you have a college roommate that you hung out with all the time but now that careers have started, you no longer have time for each other? Reach out to them.
Do you routinely see someone, have great chats with them, but never had the time to start up a friendship, although you feel there is great potential? Reach out to them.
How about a bus-stop friend that you saw daily for years, but never got to hang out any other time? Reach out to them.
Have a family member who you haven't seen in years and miss them? Let them know! Reach out to them.
Stop putting people off for another activity, endeavor, hobby, etc. Fellowship is important. It feels good. It keeps us grounded. It heals our hearts. It keeps us connected. It is the old-fashioned good-time we all used to have before technology took over the world. Let's get back to that!
So, I have a challenge for all of you...
CHALLENGE
How about during November and December this year, you reach out to someone. Anyone. Family, friend, acquaintance, coworker, teacher, etc. Invite them to your home for a Holiday Meal. Go all out! Make them feel the love you have for them. Make them feel how special they are to you. Make them have a reason to smile a little bigger! Eat food. Have good laughs. Play card games, board games, or dice!
BUT, limit this meal to only that one family you choose; that way they are getting your undivided attention (this is key!). Show them that you do have time for them and just them. That they matter to you.
And then ask them to pay it forward to continue the trend!
Do this at least once; in addition to your usual family Thanksgiving or family Christmas parties. Make this one meal a special occasion for the one family of your choice. It's time we all focus some time on others and not just on ourselves. Spread the love!
*And if you're up for it, take a picture of you all around the table enjoying this meal and post it to social media with the hashtag #payadinner4ward and share the link to this blog post so people know the reasoning behind it.
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